Wassup!

Colleen's thoughts on writing, directing and coaching, and her unique take on life itself!

Friday, February 23, 2007

"cutting back.."

I know people who say they want to quit smoking, drinking and other (mental and physical) health-compromising or chemical substances.

How?

They tell me they're "cutting back."

Here's the deal:

If we're addicted to ... whatever ... sex, cigarettes, booze, drugs, people who aren't healthy for us, internet porn, porn, anger, video games, TV, feeling victimized, food, sugar, work, being poor, being rich, clubbing, a person, candy, praise, wha'-evah ... "cutting back" isn't really going to help us kick the habit.

First, we need to understand an addiction is something we abuse or consume to prevent us from feeling or dealing with our feelings or our lives as they really are .. (i.e., reality). Without that crutch, we can get pretty upset, desperate -- in other words actually experience feelings we'd rather not.

So the idea of "cutting back" sounds reasonable.

Like, instead of having 20 cigarettes a day, I'm "cutting back" to 10. Before long, I'll cut back to 5, then 3, then 2, then 1, then NONE!

Trouble is, when we postpone doing anything addictive .... when we "finally" get it?

It is experienced as a reward.

"I haven't had a cigarette in five hours. I used to have one every four! I'm waiting until hour number six to have one!"

When that hour number six rolls around ... aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. (Your Bic is flicked.) Puuuuuuuuuuuuff. Exhaaaaaaaaaaaale. (Repeat, repeat, repeat, extinguish)

Reward.

Get it?

Sad as it is, the only way to kick any habit is to cut it out. As in cut it out of your life.

There are *tons* of websites online, local groups, counselors and books that can help you deal with and cut out any habit that's getting in the way of your best life!

My actors - almost all of them - are addiction-free because to be a great actor one must be able to access their feelings, and that's downright impossible while practicing any addiction. They don't necessarily come to me that way - they make the choice that learning to live their lives to the fullest - to pursue their passion - they can only do it without abusing any addictive substances.

The question often gets down to: are we worth it?

Are we worth pursuing our passion, living our lives to the fullest, doing what we love and being with people who genuinely love us, treasure us and aren't afraid to show anyone how much they care for us? Being with people we genuinely love, treasure and aren't afraid to show anyone we care for them?

Listen.

Hear that clock?

Tick tick tick tick.

That's the sound of this lifetime winding down.

Are you worth -- is your life -- worth being happy, healthy, loved and loving?

Just asking.

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