Colleen's thoughts on writing, directing and coaching, and her unique take on life itself!

Monday, January 22, 2007


A group of men who got together to drink after work often was the topic of a study I heard about several years ago - if you know the citation I'd love for you to send it to me.

Basically, the men were videotaped at the bar where they gathered almost nightly for drinks - usually several.

The men would come to work the next morning in varying states of sobriety or hangover - but all swearing they had a great time the night before as they happily reviewed the fantastic experiences and laughs they shared!

They were shocked to see the video of their evening - which showed them mostly sitting in silence, often looking downright sad as they drank their night away - only occasionally bursting out in laughter or cheering a sports team if they were watching a game on the bar TV.

Instead of showing the effects of socializing with co-workers after work hours, the study showed the effects of alcohol abuse on the impressions the men had about their experiences at the bar. The men were pretty upset to see themselves "in real life" looking quite unlike they saw themselves - the impressions that they recalled about the night before.

Interesting how we need to remember some things - particularly the notion that sometimes we want to remember things in ways they actually did not happen. I wonder why we try like hell to hang on to how we were *sure* something happened or didn't happen or who said what or who didn't do this or who did that to make our perceived perceptions right, even though they might be completely wrong.

Usually, in these cases, we're only a conversation away from the truth - but it's a conversation we refuse to initiate because ... well, I can only guess we're afraid of that truth; of that reality.

Silly humans.

Animals don't have this problem.

They always live in the moment of truth - going for what they want and need. No need to manipulate, convince, contrive or obfuscate life as it actually occurs.

I'm not certain people are strong enough to deal with life as it actually occurs.

Seems that we have to create ways to explain things in order to suit our individual beliefs - whether it's the origin of the human species or who is to blame for our unhappiness. This way we make ourselves feel we're still in control.

Even though we never really are in control of anything but our own thoughts and feelings. I mean, face it. When we lie in bed in the dead of night - that's all we have. I guess the question is whether those thoughts and feelings help us or hurt us as we plan to wake up and live the next day.


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